Here are the basic tenants of my theory. The fact that I was a business major and had absolutely no scientific training does not make my theory any less irrefutable. I took a predicate logic class, so I know what I'm doing here, okay?
Marjie's Incontrovertible Squirrel Theory
- Squirrels are cute.
- Chubby squirrels are very cute.
- Squirrels get chubby for the winter.
- I get chubby for the winter.
- It is winter.
- Therefore, I am very cute.
It's only mid-January, but it has already been a long, hard winter here in Chicago. The only way for me to feel warm is to have a full belly. I can't get enough lasagna, creamy soup or hot chocolate. As for exercise, I haven't moved from the fire since Thanksgiving. But I'm not worried about the extra pounds I've packed on. Based on my squirrel theory, I know I'm cuter than ever.
There is now a Squirrel Club at the University of Michigan. You can check out their website (and pictures of some very chubby squirrels) at: www.michigansquirrels.com.