Sunday, January 18, 2009

Confessions of a Prude

While I like to think I'm open minded and adventurous, there are a few current fashions I admit I'm too prudish to follow. I don't know if it's my age or I'm just uptight, but here are a few hot trends that leave me cold.

1.  Tattoos 
Tatts have gone mainstream, but I don't see their appeal. From only a few feet away the details of the designs are lost and they simply look like bruises or smudges. But aesthetics aside, tattoos don't stand the test of time. A woman's values and beliefs change as she matures; that inky deep-tissue artwork is forever. The chick with the Tinkerbell tattoo at right might not find the same deep meaning in magic wands and pixie dust ten years from now. 

2. Thongs 
I abhor pantylines as much as the next gal, but must I walk around with a perpetual wedgie to prevent them? There isn't any other place for that little string to go but right up my... okay, too much information, but it hurts. While thongs are sexy and eliminate pantylines, they leave the butt cheeks exposed to dimple and wobble at will. My favorite undies are Victoria's Secret seamless hiphuggers, which may be granny pants by today's standards, but I need the coverage  - and the comfort.

3. Over-processed hair "down there."  
Bikini waxing has become de rigueur, but many fashionistas are taking the grooming of their nether regions to further extremes.  One popular style is the Brazilian, where every single hair is ripped from the tender area, leaving it completely bare. The problem with this treatment is that the hair inevitably grows back, but it has to be at least 1/4 inch long before waxing can be repeated. So, after the first couple weeks aren't you left in a razor-stubbley state? I'm not sure this is an improvement.

Many frisky females who opt to keep some hair are jazzing it up. One current trend is to color the hair down under.  Betty Beauty has designed a number of special shades for the area - their best seller is hot pink. Call me a stick in the mud, but there's only one guy who has viewing rights to my hoo-ha and he could care less what color it is. He'd be happy if I'd just throw on a thong once in a while.

I'd like to hear what other women think about the above trends because maybe I'm missing out on something big. Post your comments here by clicking on the comments link below. You can post anonymously.


Anonymous said...

I totally agree will all your observations. On a personal note, I had one Brazilian wax in my past, and I would never do it again. I don't know if anyone else has experienced this, but it was difficut to climax when I had no hair down there. I think you need a little friction to get things to work correctly. Ha Ha.

Marjie Killeen said...

Wow, that's a side effect I hadn't even considered! Thanks for the tip Anonymous!

celticred63 said...

Tattoos: I've got two, which I got 15 years ago. They are timeless because they say nothing about me or my beliefs, they're just pretty and I'm still happy with them. Yes they hurt, no I won't be getting any more. Thongs = I have one question for all men out there: "Would YOU wear one?" 'Nuf said. Next question! Waxing? OUCH. Omigosh, just take a petite pair of scissors trim once in a while for pete's sake! I've settled the bikini hair issue by buying a bathing suit that goes down to the middle of my thighs.